Summer Plans

Today is July 1st and I have been busy putting plans together for the start of this month.

...And here we are.
I don't feel ready, or completely settled, but I don't think that matters. These are steps I'm planning to take to help me get to a New Place. A year from now I want to look back and see such a shift in how I live my life, that I find it hard to judge my abilities in the future. I want to say,  "Wow, look at that! You really CAN do something if you put your mind to it! Awesome job!"

So... what's the plan?

Well, as is my style, I have looked over several approaches to decluttering, pairing down clothing, getting out of debt, and I plan to incorporate a bit of each. Here's the the overall picture:

No.1 - Spending Ban

About a year ago I tried to do a spending ban. I had just read The Year of Less (Cait Flanders), and was excited to try my hand at becoming a more mindful consumer - owning less and saving more. This year, in the midst of everything 2020, my husband and I are both on board to see this thru.

New Year, New Track... And the long path to it.

We are two weeks into the new year, and I have yet to get myself on track. I don't mean going to the gym, and eating more salads... Although that is also on my list. What I'm talking about is just the normal flow of things. Life day-to-day, when it's not encompassing holiday plans.

Part of the reason for this delay is because I'm house-sitting for my parents. I'm traveling between my apartment and my parents house to take care of two sets of animals, keeping an eye on food between both homes (to see what will expire first), and keeping myself spread out between responsibilities. The other part, which just wrapped up this weekend, is my transition from my seasonal day work to my work and income plans for this coming year.


My work: 

I have made the scary decision to drop my normal day job, in pursuit of work that is musically inclined. I have a Music Degree, and I have performed in this industry for many years. I've also taught music lessons, and provided music for private parties and events. It has been several years since I have done this as a business on my own, but I feel called to work with music again.

Setting Boundaries

Let me start by saying that this is one of my worst skills. I'm writing this because I know it is a personal struggle that directly impacts my journey from cluttered chaos to a minimalist lifestyle. Even if people in your life are supporting your goals, they can get in your way by eating up your time and energy. Likewise, you can set out with the best plans to get things done, and not set proper boundaries with yourself to avoid distraction. Boundaries are essential for change.

Let me share with you a recent occurrence of a  personal boundary issue, that I encountered...

Just this week, a family member hijacked my day off from work. I had made plans with them, to get together around noon for an activity. At 11:15am they called me to say that they needed to run across town (something they had planned to do before we got together, but their day ran behind). I was concerned, with this added errand, that our visit would go past my available time. They knew that I needed to be wrapped up and leaving by 3 p.m.

I gave them the choice: I could come with them on their drive and we could visit in the car, or they could call me when they were back on this side of town and we would see what time there was left. They opted to have me visit with them on their drive. So at noon, I pulled into their driveway and joined them in their car to set off.

We were driving an hour out, in lunchtime traffic, but I wasn't too concerned because we had three hours total to get there and back before I needed to leave. They decided to stop off for some food on the way, so we went inside a fast food place for a quick bite. After that we arrived at our destination.

After waiting for about 20 minutes, I was surprised when this family member turned to me, and stated that they were "thinking we should just visit here for a couple hours before we head back."

Originally, they were supposed to be out in this area earlier in the day, dropping something off, and then they were going to come back and pick it up in the evening... But because things got so delayed, they figured we would just stick around and bring the item back in one trip.

When I looked down at my phone to check the time, I realize that it was already 5 minutes before 3pm. I was absolutely shocked that they had completely violated the time limit I had given our visit, and beyond that, they assumed I could stay longer!

Now, I was across town by an hour, without a vehicle of my own, and way off schedule. I let them know that this was not going to be an option, and in fact I was running late for my own schedule. They quickly adjusted, and we ran an errand for me on the way back to my car. But I did not end up returning to my vehicle until 4:30pm, but I didn't make it home again until after 5pm.

I was exhausted following this visit, so when I got home, I took a nap. After I woke up, my husband and I had dinner and attempted to reclaim our schedule that evening. But things had been pushed so much later then we had planned, that there were several things we weren't able to accomplish. I was upset with myself that I had allowed my day to be taken over - especially when I had so clearly set limitations and boundaries with this person going in! Moving forward, I decided that I'm not comfortable allowing this person to be in charge of transportation during future visits.

Boundaries with Others

Has something like this ever happened to you? People will treat you as you teach them to treat you. If someone is used to you being available for a favor, or to talk on the phone, or to cover a shift at work... they will expect that you are still going to be available in these ways, even if you're working on your own things. Most of the time, it's not malicious when people get in your way. But bear in mind, this doesn't change the fact that they are getting in the way.

If you do have someone who is actively not supporting your lifestyle changes, it may be necessary to keep your progress to yourself. Maybe you just don't share your journey with that person. And perhaps our would be a good idea to take a moment to analyze why they would not be supportive of that change... do they fear that you will no longer need them? Are they worried you will fail? Do they worry that you are going to become a better person and outgrow them?

The changes that you decide to make in your life, and the path that you take, is for you. Don't let anybody else define how you live your life. Suggestions are great, and we all want support, but we don't need approval to go after the things we want in our own lives.

Finding Focus for Yourself 

In my process, it is very easy for me to imagine the lifestyle that I want, but it can be difficult to take steps toward creating that vision. It's not just the exhaustion of sorting through things, it can be just as difficult to schedule a block of time for these tasks.

I find it works best to set my phone to airplane mode, and put on a timer, so I can focus on what I need to accomplish without interruption. Otherwise, right as I get started - I'll receive a call from my my mother, then my best friend will message me, and I'll end up pulled into everyone else's day. I do make a point to message my husband, so he knows I'm not available for a limited time frame, but other than that I try to block things out that can wait. My priority is the task in front of me.

If I'm wanting to play music, I'll download a playlist on Spotify and go offline. I try not to listen to podcasts or audio books while I'm sorting, because it distracts my focus. I save those for cleaning tasks only, but it's all personal preference. Use what works for you, as long as it's actually working. (ie, folding laundry in front of the TV may only be a good idea if it's the last thing you're planning to do before you relax that evening)

Boundaries with Yourself

You can also get in your own way of progress. If your tasks are overwhelming, or if you don't set them as a priority, you may find yourself doing other things instead of progressing on your projects of decluttering, exercising, or any other goals you are pursuing. Be honest with yourself. Know when you are feeling overwhelmed or unmotivated, and give yourself the chance to analyze what will work best in that moment. Sometimes breaking down a task into a super simple project, like sorting out one small drawer, can be enough to get over that hump. Sometimes you may need to walk away for a moment and do a bit of self-care.

Really be honest with yourself about what activities recharge you versus distracting you from what you don't want to face. If you sit down and read a book or magazine for 10 minutes, you're going to feel different than if you watch a TV show. Some other great options are to meditate for 15 minutes, or go for a short walk, or take a 20-min nap. Self-care might be all you need to reset and come back to your task at hand.

I find that it is helpful to set a timer, giving myself no more than 30 minutes to do something else, then I check it with how I'm feeling. Try not to nap for longer than 20 or 40 minutes, and often following rest with a healthy snack can reenergize. If you feel like you need to sleep longer than that, maybe you need to look at how well you are sleeping each night. Sleep deprivation can really suck at your energy reserves. 

For more information on how to set boundaries, feel free to check out these other articles and blogs:

https://psychcentral.com/lib/10-way-to-build-and-preserve-better-boundaries/

https://www.healthline.com/health/mental-health/set-boundaries

*Please note, I do NOT own the rights to images used in THIS blog post. 
For credit, please contact me.*

1st Area - Kitchen

We are starting in the kitchen, because aside from the bathroom, it is the smallest room in the house. We have a small eating nook, coffee station, cookware and everything we need to keep the area self-contained. Hopefully meaning that once we clear it out, we can be finished with that area and functioning out of the room properly. 

Overall measurements:

The room itself is 9" by 11" but with our counters and appliances all on one wall, the usable space is more like 5" by 10" with a walkway on one end and an outside door on the other.

We have tried different arrangements for furniture, all in an attempt to create counter space that we don't actually have. At one point, we even had our 3'x5' dining table against the long wall across from our sink. It's definitely a work in progress.



Starting at the top:

When I surveyed the room, I realized that I would have to start small. So focused on the upper cupboards, above the counter space. We have three cupboards (if you count each separate unit as one) with six cupboard doors, running from the fridge, above the counters and sink, across the top of the stove.

I pulled open each cupboard and took a photo, giving myself a "before" snapshot of what we had been functioning out of. Then, starting from the left, I started to pull everything out of the cupboards, wiping down each surface, and reorganize where I wanted the items. Keeping in mind "ease of use", I moved the drinking glasses to just over the sink and lowered the glass Tupperware by one shelf.

I immediately pulled out anything that I knew we hadn't been using, leaving it on the counter as I sorted. I knew that we would have too many mugs, and I pulled out any plastic ware that we didn't need in favor of some of the nicer wear, like glass and porcelain. Then I put everything back together, and took new photos of the cupboards.

Even though things are a lot more organized, and a lot of the extra clutter has been removed, I am still not happy with how much I have left in my cupboards. Some of this is because we live in an apartment, and we don't have a full house space to spread things out. Some of this is because I'm afraid to let go more than I am ready to let go of... but I have decided that during this process I will be swift. Anything that I feel comfortable with will go, and the things that I don't feel comfortable with will stay, and I will probably go through this process more than once.



Wrap up:

I have not yet addressed what is being stored over the cupboards, or what is stacked above the fridge. I have plenty of spaces to dive into, and I think one small space at a time is going to be the best approach. At the completion of this room, I will share the full list of what we've removed.


What do you think?

Any pointers? What works for you? What's the smallest amount of dishes, cups, cookware you could see yourself happily owning? I'd love to hear your thoughts below. 

Approved List

As promised, I am posting our Approved Shopping List for the Year of Spending Less. These are items we will need to replace, or have already decided on purchasing, that will be allowed over the course of the next year.

Approved Shopping List:

• A new (used) car
• New laptop (probably refurbished)
• Protective laptop case
• Work Gear (husband)
• Guestroom futon 
• New Mattress/Bed/Foundation Support
• A tattoo (both of us, me for sure) 
• Updated Gaming Console (preferably used) 
• Messenger Bag (for my husband) 
• Sustainable Items (to replace plastics and one-use items) 
• Candles (only one per month, if desired)
• Plants/Supplies for Herbal Cooking Garden
• Outdoor/Biking Gear (as needed for trips & planned activities)

Notes about the list...

The list was compiled in no particular order, but I did decide to list the more necessary items at the top. We will need a second car in the coming months, and a new laptop has been on our list for some time. Work gear is expected but unknown, as my husband is changing directions. And we have plans, once we clear things out, to purchase an affordable futon (that we've already shopped around for and chosen) for our guest room.

The candles are not necessary, as I have a collection I'm working thru, but I listed the option because I do use them regularly and I believe there is a good chance I may run out in less than a year. The "herbal garden" is a future plan as well, for when the house is cleaned up. I have always wanted to cook with fresh herbs available, so I've included it for when the space is ready. I don't expect everything on the list to be purchased immediately, but making this list did bring our priorities to light. Seeing everything we actually wanted listed out, we could also see that our money has been wasted on stuff we didn't really care...

Other than this list, and basic consumables, we'll be focusing on not purchasing anything new for our home. Books and videos will be rented from the library or borrowed. I will be cancelling my Audible Account for the year, which will be hard. We have canceled our underutilized gym membership, and we will be looking at the necessity of any subscriptions we currently have.

We have decided to keep our shared Spotify account, because we use it daily, and for the $10 per month, we believe it's worth it for the content. We don't have cable or internet at our home, and unless it becomes necessary for income purposes, we will keep to just our cell phone data service.

Avoiding Temptation

Something that Cait did her book (link to previous entry about this) that I thought was really smart, was that she unsubscribed from all digital adverts. She stopped receiving emails about sales, and anything that she might want to shop for. It will take us a moment to get ourselves off of every list that we have subscribed to, but we are planning to do the same.

My only exceptions for this are emails from Kroger (where we buy most of our groceries), and emails from the company that I work for... Even though the emails are advertising sales and new products, I still plan to review them in order to stay informed for our customers, everything else will have to be cut.

Clearing Out Clutter 

As for our excess of physical items, I will be clearing things out using three options: Throw Away, Donate or Sell. I think there is a lot of junk and paperwork that can just be tossed. A fair bit of it can be donated and used by someone else. And for some nicer items, I will try to resell them at a marked down cost to put toward savings.

I'm going to try to Throw Out or Donate most of the clutter, because it's too easy to put higher value on stuff than it really deserves. I don't want a whole room of stuff that I'm keeping, because I'm waiting tosell it. My planned limit is one month, and after that time I will donate any items that haven't sold.

I will still be using Poshmark, and possibly FB marketplace, to sell my items, but I will not be shopping in these forums. Hopefully, as I pare down my closet, I will feel less in inclined to shop and add more stuff back to it.

What do you think? Do you have any questions about our plan? Is there anything I haven't addressed that you'd liked me to share or keep track of? Please comment below, I'd love to know your thoughts!